Skip to main content

Get Men Into Your LIFEGroup!

this is an article from "Building Small Groups"

Drawing Men into Small Groups

A proven plan for reaching reluctant men.
From the Church Leaders Answer Book

As one leader put it, "A man is a hard thing to reach!" Yet few ministries have as much potential to revive our families, churches, and communities. When one man turns to Jesus Christ, it breaks a chain of bondage to sin and broken relationships. One changed man can set a family for many generations on a new course of joy, peace, and reconciliation.

Here's how churches are redesigning their systems to produce men who love God, provide spiritual leadership to their families, and serve the Lord:

1. Begin with a clear understanding of your purpose for men in the church. The first step is to write down what you're trying to accomplish and why. If your purpose statement were "To equip the men of our church to be spiritual leaders," you probably wouldn't focus on service projects. Instead, you would focus on discipleship groups.

2. Find a leader. All you need to get started is one man with passion to reach other men. You need to put one of your best men on this—someone the other men respect. You need to give him a budget. And you need to give him support from the pulpit. Don't let a man elect himself to leadership if the others think he is a loser.

3. Build a leadership team. Invite a few other potential leaders to meet regularly for Bible study, prayer, and, eventually, strategic planning. Your leadership team must be more than a planning committee; it must be a living demonstration of what you want to reproduce. Men want to be a part of something going somewhere. If your team can offer a purpose-driven plan (versus event-driven), other men will gravitate to it.

4. Create initial momentum. This is best accomplished by a momentum-building event built around a topic men are drawn to, such as sports, financial success, or fathering skills. We reach fringe men by providing what they need in the context of what they want. But the event itself is not the most important tactic here: it's men engaging other men that makes the difference.

5. Capture momentum. Give attendees a definite next step that they can visualize themselves taking. Don't shift them from first to fourth, offer them second gear—perhaps a small-group study that lasts three, four, maybe six weeks in length. Give men every chance to hook into something. Offer Bible studies, book studies, ministry projects, leadership development with the pastor—whatever you can imagine—to sustain momentum.

6. Repeat the cycle. You will experience drop-off at every step. That's why it's important periodically to re-create momentum.


1. What might you (or your husband, father, brother) see as the most compelling reason to join a small group?

2. Why is "men engaging other men" more important than clever programming?

3. What kinds of needs or wants do the men in our church have? How could we plan a momentum-initiating event around those needs?

— Patrick Morley, "Reaching The Disconnected Male," Leadership (Winter, 2001)

Copyright © 2006

, ,


Popular posts from this blog

Discussion Questions for Easter

Have several people ask the question, “What’s the most important thing you’ve ever done?”
Ask other people, “What do you hope to accomplish in the next several years of your life?”
Tell your class that today you’ll be talking about “life mission” or the one most important thing you do that drives everything else. Tell them that Jesus’ resurrection from the dead is the defining moment in history, so it should be the defining moment in our lives.
Read 1 Corinthians 15:12-19. How does the resurrection impact some of the crucial beliefs of Christianity? 
How would Christianity be different if there was no resurrection? How would you be different without the resurrection?
Read 1 Corinthians 15:50-58. What are some specific ways that the resurrection gives us hope?
If you had been a friend of Jesus when he was on earth, how would the resurrection have impacted your life? 
How do you think his followers then were effected by the resurrection?
Read 1 Corinthians 15:58. What do you t…

21 Bible Passages With Which Every Small Group Leader Should Be Familiar

Matthew 5:23-24.
23"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

Luke 10:1-11.
1After this the Lord appointed seventy-two[a] others and sent them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go. 2He told them, "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. 3Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. 4Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.

5"When you enter a house, first say, 'Peace to this house.' 6If a man of peace is there, your peace will rest on him; if not, it will return to you. 7Stay in that house, eating and drinking whatever they give you, for the worker deserves his wages. Do not move around from house to hous…

SOAPY Bible Study

In the past, I've written about and talked about the SOAP method of Bible study. This is a simple Bible study method which can be utilized by an individual or a small group. All you need is a passage of Scripture and 15-30 minutes (a journal is helpful).

Many churches use this method of Bible study for their groups. Some have modified the SOAP method by adding a Y. Read more about it below:

This Bible study is an intentional focused effort of growing in the understanding of the scriptures. This form of study will assist in the transformation of our inner lives as we mature in understanding and in faith.
Set aside 15 minutes every day for the study. You might want to take more time after you have gotten started. Don’t overload yourself in the beginning. Keep a “soapy” journal because there will be the need to write everyday. As you develop your routine, share what you are learning with your Discipleship Group, Sunday school class, Circle, other groups in which you participate, or …